Abby's Sick Day: Part 2

Abigail woke up later this morning than the past two mornings with no fever. Yay! So she's playing hooky for one more day to ensure that she is well enough to go to school tomorrow. (The only thing she really cares about is that she is healthy enough to trick-or-treat on Saturday.)

We have spent our day reading books to Carter, watching TV, discovering our appetites again, cutting pomegranate (it was the first time for the both of us and I hope my wife can get the stains out of my T-shirt) and taking in a Shrek movie on DVD - the Christmas one of course. Trace Adkins is right. I'm gonna miss this.

Abby's Sick Day

We found out on Saturday that Abby has "pink eye." The doctor at the urgent care facility we visited in Fuquay said that after she has the prescribed antibiotic eye drops for 24 hours, she shouldn't be contagious. Since Saturday her eyes have gotten better but she is showing more cold symptoms including a low-grade fever. By Wake County's school policy this means she gets to stay home with her unemployed dad and her baby sister Carter. We haven't accomplished a whole lot today, but we have enjoyed spending the lazy time together. The picture to the right is of Abby and the 'comforter' a.k.a. Buster. He's a great companion for sick days.

If Abby had not been sick, her unemployed father could have spent the time job searching, networking, applying for jobs, or some other activity that would lead me to that all important next step in my career. This inconvenient detour of the aforementioned goal of securing another job was... welcome. I hope I cherish all the time we have spent together.

Sooo... I'm Back

Judging from the date of my last blog post, it has been over six months since I have written anything here. Funny thing is that I could have written about a lot of stuff and yet I have chosen not to for some reason. I guess it's the old perfectionist attitude in me that says "if it can't be perfect, don't do it all... and do boring stuff like watching TV all day... and whatnot." (I love the conversation filler 'and whatnot' because it really doesn't say or describe anything but at the same time it tells a lot... and whatnot.)

I recently read Don Miller's new book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, and it inspired me write this post this morning. An email from an old friend further encouraged me to sit down in front of my keyboard and do this.

Life and time are just passing me by these days and I need something to help me feel productive at the same time so I'm writing. So this post is to relieve the log jam of ideas and experiences I have stored up so I can fulfill the objective stated in the previous sentence.

If I'm the only one who reads this, then I believe it will have been time well spent. By the way, the picture is our newest addition, Carter. She was born July 6, 2009. We'll talk about her story later.

Reciprocal Blessings?

As a youth I never participated in my church’s youth group. So I am unsure what originally drew me to get involved in the lives of church youth. Maybe it had something to do with swim coaching kids for five years and thoroughly enjoying their company and watching them grow. Maybe it was because I felt like I missed something when I was that age and now I am trying to relive that part of my life through the lives of our church’s youth. Whatever the reason, my wife Monica and I first became youth counselors when we lived in Hickory, NC. After moving to the Apex area and after Lee Barnes became a pastor, we were afforded another opportunity to participate in the spiritual lives of the senior high youth at Apex UMC. That choice to get involved has blessed my life to a degree that cannot be expressed with words.

Becoming a youth counselor is similar to a lot of things in life. You are inevitably bound to go through ‘highs’ and ‘lows.’ There are times when I am overcome with excitement, joy, and appreciation for what God is doing in the lives of young people, not to mention my own. And there are other times when I question if I have what it takes to mentor this group of people. Am I really making a difference? Sometimes I question whether God has really called me to this ministry with younger people. At the end of the day, I do believe I am called to actively participate in our youths’ lives and I relish the opportunity to offer them my support, love, and guidance through true friendship.

“Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and glorify your father in heaven,” (Matthew 5:16) is not only one of my favorite verses from the Bible, it is also something I try to emulate. I can certainly tell you that our youth have been great examples for me in this way. I remember last year I had the opportunity to participate in the 30-hour famine with some of our senior high. During this fasting campaign, the youth were split into groups and given $40 and the instructions to go out into the community and do as much good as you can possibly do. The contest was to be judged to see who best utilized their time and resources.

Our group decided to use the money to buy food at BJ’s, assemble bag lunches, and then visit the homeless in Raleigh to distribute them. We bought the food and assembled more than 40 bags; complete with bottled water, then we drove up to downtown Raleigh. We split up the bags among the members of the group and walked into an area near Moore’s Square where we met several homeless folks who were hungry. We gave out the lunches in less than five minutes. It broke my heart to see so many people in need. I took the time acknowledge each person who received a bag from me with the phrase, “may God bless you.” I also took the time to look at the faces of the other members in our group. Their light was shining forth in such a way that I glorified God, thanking him for the opportunity to be in fellowship with this wonderful group of young people.

That group project is just one of many exciting examples of how the youth of our church serve in ways that lead me to praise God for them every single day. They selflessly serve in ministries such as small group and worship leading in 252 Basics, they take part in FamilyTime, they lead other small groups, and they participate in missions like Appalachian Service Project and Apex Outreach Service Project. Quite often on Sunday mornings you will find some of them teaching or helping in Sunday school classes of younger children. Incidentally, isn’t it odd that members of our youth are more likely to agree to substitute in a children’s Sunday school class than some parents are?

Our youth have had a tremendous impact on my life and undoubtedly the lives of many others in our community and our world. I pray that God will use me in a similar fashion to bless their lives as they continue to learn, dream, grow, and serve. If I could positively affect their lives half as much as they have affected mine, it would indeed be an answer to prayer.

Patience

It has been forty-one days since my last day at Environmental Quality Management. The private equity firm that bought a majority share of the company a couple of years ago decided in January that cost-cutting measures needed to be implemented for the good of the company. Like many companies in this rough economic climate, the board chose to lay off several people as part of that cost reduction strategy and along with fourteen others, I was laid off. I wasn't surprised necessarily because many companies over the last several months have been laying people off. But I guess until it happens to you, many people like me don't think it will ever happen.

Since that day I have survived by the grace of God and the love and support of family and friends. Generally speaking I have been upbeat, positive and hopeful about the future, trusting God that everything will work out according to his plan. It is quite remarkable actually. If my faith was not as strong as it is now, I think I would be in a much darker place. I am thankful for the many blessings that I have received over my lifetime and my good friend taught me to also pray for those blessings that also have not been received. It's comforting but why do I find it hard at this particular moment to be patient, waiting for that next career opportunity to materialize?

I have been fairly diligent in my job hunting efforts, although I probably could devote a little more time and energy to it. And I have been fortunate to interview for a couple of opportunities over the past month or so. It's coming down to the end for one opportunity in particular where I have interviewed with six different people including the president and vice president of the company, but still no good word on who and when they expect to hire. What's frustrating is they have moved the target hire date a couple of times since I first interviewed over a month ago. The latest news is they plan to make a decision by the end of this week. It wouldn't surprise me if they decided to push that date back even further. The excrutiating thing for me is that I am growing more and more impatient as the days and interviews continue. I know God is giving me this time to be patient for Him, but it is becoming increasingly difficult.

I suppose I will find out soon enough and I have prepared myself for the worst. The position will be awarded to either me or another candidate who is also in the running. My fear at this point is that I have not prepared myself enough for the worst.

Christmas Remembered

Praise God from whom all blessings flow. For He has taught me more about grace this Christmas season through the behavior of my children that privately brought me tears of joy.

In an earlier post titled, "How did Christmas get so screwed up," I lamented the fact that I have confused my children regarding the true meaning of Christmas. I prayed for God to forgive me for confusing my children's hearts with things that were not of Him and that his true love would shine through in their hearts this Christmas season. I know now that this prayer was answered and may have already been answered before I knew it. My fear was that my children would somehow be disappointed on Christmas morning and through that disappointment they would lose sight of the true meaning of Christmas, God's gift to this world through the birth of our Lord and Savior, Christ Jesus.

Preparing for the worst but hoping for the best on this Christmas morning 2008, I was pleasantly filled with joy. My children taught me a little more about grace and humility on that day, giving me another booster shot of faith that eventually brought me to tears.

The dilemma was they had Christmas lists that were at least a mile long and they were going to receive only a few things from those lists. Even though I know that the only good gifts come from God and are not of this world, still we have somehow bought into the materialism that is our societal norm evidenced by our daughters' wish lists.

Christmas morning came and our daughters received a modest amount of gifts from Santa, her parents and her grandparents. But instead of the disappointment I expected to see from them, I saw grace, humility, thankfulness, and love.

It culminated in an exchange between Monica and Kaelyn.

Monica: [to Kaelyn] "Did you get everything you wanted?"

I cringed when she asked this, thinking that the response would be disappointing.

Kaelyn: "Yes... and then some"

I'm quite certain that no one saw the tears that welled up in my eyes at Kaelyn's response to my wife's question. These tears of joy were evidence to me that Kaelyn knows that Christmas is not about getting every single thing you write down on your list. Later I asked her what is the reason that we celebrate Christmas. She answered simply, "Jesus' birth."

That is all I needed to hear.

All praise and glory are yours, God. Thank you for blessing me with children who know you better than I do. Thank you for having faith in me even when I doubt you at times. I do not know why you have blessed me far beyond my wildest dreams because you know I don't deserve it. But I'm so glad that you have. I pray that you will allow me to utilize those blessings to bless others in ways that they give you praise and glorify you.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. Only His name isn't Santa Claus.

Thank you, God.

Catching up...

Why is it that a lot of us feel as though we're trying to 'catch up' all the time? To 'catch up' means that you have also bought the assumption that you are 'behind.' Which brings me to another favorite saying I heard my mother express from time to time, "it'll get done when it gets done."

Whether you are a task master or a person who suffers with the symptoms of ADHD, accomplishing things is what we all do. Feeling that you need to catch up on your various tasks can be objective, although in many cases it is subjective - meaning that many of us carry around undue anxiety to 'catch up.' Well I'm through. I'm through with making myself feel like I'm desperately trying to bail out the Titanic with a thimble.

So today, instead of 'catching up,' I decided to read some of the posts from the blogs I follow. My new pal Greg (who is a friend of a friend who decided to chronicle the battle he's currently having with cancer) referenced part of a Christmas poem by Alfred Lord Tennyson in his blog, Greg's Alien (http://gregsalien.blogspot.com/2008/12/hair-todaygone-today.html). I took a deep breath, exhaled and read the poem in it's entirety. If you've stumbled upon this blog by accident (which can be the only reason why you're reading this right now) and you want to read the poem too, here it is... http://www.carols.org.uk/snow-ring-out-wild-bells-tennyson.htm. Happy Christmas and may your joy be full this holiday season!